some i wrote with friends, most i wrote by myself. I'm thinking of trying to start a band again despite my previous/failed attempts. My band will be called Empty Existence. Inspired by Staind, Sevendust, Seether, Three Days Grace, Trapt, Trust Company, Evanescence, Ben Moody, Unwritten Law, Puddle of Mudd, Nirvana, Foo Fighters, Papa Roach, Chevelle, Fuel, Grey Daze, Killswitch Engage, Avenged Sevenfold, Atreyu, My Chemical Romance, Rise Against, Shadows Fall, Mudvayne, Disturbed, Green Day, Hoobastank, Good Charlotte, Simple Plan, Yellowcard and MxPx and the musicial styles that'll be played is Alternative Rock, Industrial/Goth Rock, Hard Rock, Melodic Rock, Punk Rock, Acoustic Rock, Grunge, Metal, Nu-Metal, Hardcore, Emocore and Soft/Slowcore. Anyway, here's some stuff:

"Push Myself Away" - by me

What the fuck am I doing here? What is this, another game? Are you forcing me into fear? I won't allow myself to feel shame So let me the fuck outta here!

(Chorus):
I'm not falling I'm not bending I'm not breaking I'm not hurting So I'm pushing myself away

FROM YOU!

I've been fighting all these years Trying to hold on, so I can live forever and not kill myself All the times I spilled my guts while shedding tears I put you all and my pain up on the shelf Now let me move on!

(Chorus)

FROM EVERYONE!

(Chorus)

FROM THE PAIN!
FROM THE HATE!
FROM EVERYTHING BAD!
FROM ALL THAT DISGUSTS ME!

PUSH AWAY (2x)

(Bridge):
I've come too far to lose it all again I didn't come all this way, spilling my guts and healing, just so you could take it all away from me again It took me this long to get better It took me even longer to kick all the habits Hey, I'm not perfect now, but at least I'm okay without you and all that was once in my way... So FUCK YOU! GOOD-BYE! I'M FINE AGAIN!

(Chorus)

Pushing myself away (7x)

From YOU!
----------
"Forever Eclipse" - by me

How does hiding in a shell helps me from my enemies? How does learning those things help my brain? How does all this hypocritical bullshit they call politics help me understand more about the world? How does it happen when you try to hit me again?

(Pre-Chorus):
Just stop it... STOP IT!

(Chorus):
Turn away and pretend that I'm not here Allow me to go back into my own shell Just do me a favor and leave me alone out here Just walk away and kill someone else!

How does it helps when you feed off on me? How does it help me get back on my feet when you constantly torment me? How does it help my thinking of an escape plan when you're breathing down on my neck? How does it helps when you dare yourself to try to take me down?

(Pre-Chorus)

(Chorus)

I'M NOT FINE! I HATE MYSELF!
HOW DO YOU DO IT? THE WAY YOU TEND TO MAKE ME FORCE A BLADE UPON MYSELF? YOUR EYES ARE EVIL! YOUR HEART IS SO COLD! YOUR MIND IS SICKENING! EVERYTHING THAT I HATE IS YOU! Just.... go.... Just.... leave me alone.... Better yet.... GO KILL YOURSELF! GO KILL YOURSELF! IT'LL MAKE ME FEEL BETTER! JUST JUMP AWAY FROM THE EDGE OR DROWN YOURSELF IN VAIN! ANYTHING TO KILL YOURSELF WITH, SO IT WILL MAKE ME FEEL BETTER! I'm... sick... of ... YOU!

(Pre-Chorus)

(Chorus) 4x

GO KILL YOURSELF! IT'LL MAKE ME FEEL BETTER!
Tired... I'm tired... I'm sick of what you're doing to me..........
----------------

Well, I'll add more in a bit. What u think?

Just to let you know, Staind saved my life countless times with all 5 albums which i have, and i owe my musicial creativity and my songwriting on my personal experiences/past memories/recent memories, etc. and my life to them. Especially Aaron Lewis, the man who made it happen for me to be not afraid to write and play the lyrics based on what i went through, my opinions of other people, politics, etc. He got me walking into the open a bit. I'm not fine, but at least I try my best to get by. It's like me and him are twins. We share the same mind, thoughts, feelings everything. At least I know now that I'm not alone feeling all this pain and suffering. Thanks, Staind.

add a reply plz? i'll be adding more stuff in a minute.

"Fetal Position" by me

Hide away Withdraw myself I'm afraid Medicate myself I cannot find the strength to stand up and walk about So I lie on the floor, crawling around I've been once again broken down Falling in fear again

(Chorus):
And I curl into the fetal position (4x)

Left behind There's nothing left to find Ripped apart inside I have too many unanswered questions in my mind Run away from here, but I can't Chained with my fears, so it's hard to break free This is fucking me up Break down into tears again

(Chorus) 4x

I want to be meant for more than this Waste myself with alcohol to numb the pain Sleep tonight with more nightmares I can't trust at all It's so hard to open up So I'll lay here and ride it out and wake up on the cold, hard floor I don't wanna fail again Sick of the games we play Take it all and throw it away I fall, I crawl I break while you're fake... CURL INTO THE FETAL POSITION WITHIN THESE 4 WALLS!

(Chorus) 12x

AFRAID! (I cannot trust)
ASHAMED! (I cannot open up)
I'M HURT! (I fall apart)
I'M BROKEN! (Fetal position)
So I curl into the fetal position...
I'm so fucking afraid to trust or open up again.
---------
"Epiphany" written by me

I instill fear into me
For I woke up this morning from a dream
A dream that I've had for awhile
No words could describe what I've felt today
A dream that's a memory of how I almost died
And so, I walk around in the rain

(Chorus):
Epiphany
Everything changes (4x)

Then I got into the car
And took a drive around town
I even went past by the graveyard
This dream haunts me
'Cause the day I almost died changes the way I see things
This life is already wasted, so I gotta live more

(Chorus) 4x

I gotta grow and start living
Movin' out of a broken home
I gotta start somewhere and hopefully
I'll outgrow the pain someday

(Chorus) 4x

No
I hope I'm not too late
No
I hope I can make it

(Chorus) 6x

Epiphany (4x)
Figurin' it out on my own...
----------
"Apology" written by me

I sit here today Figure out the answers along the way So I look back again All the years with this pain I'm sorry for everything I was lost and had nothing Not many people in life can have everything Here I am, searching for something

(Chorus):
Ask for forgiveness Ask for absolution Ask for all I need to carry on I am proven wrong I've learned from my mistakes And I'm not afraid to be who I am today I commit to rebirth and love On my knees with a prayer and a apology

How stupid of me to do all the damage I've done Now I promise to heal my pain since my hatred is gone Glad that it's about damn time for me to be proven wrong I thank you all for doing this, so now I can be strong Couldn't believe that I'd make it this far

(Chorus)

Am I happy to leave my broken home? Of course I am Am I happy to see you all again? Of course I am Thanks for driving me crazy for all the knowledge that I will soon learn Repent from my self-destructive ways Why, you ask? Well, I'm on a path to find God... Free... I feel like I can BREATHE!

(Chorus) 2x

Thank you for bringing me home Thank you for making me realize that I was wrong So this is where I belong Never thought I'd be back here on my knees Never thought I'd truly find a warm, safe place right here..........
-----------
"Disturbance" written by me and Susan Torre

I just need to be left alone
I can't deal with this anymore
I can't concentrate with you around
I feel tied and bound

(Chorus):
I can't get through this
Your disturbance
Drowning in this
Just let me be

My head aches from the pain
Trying to control your insanity
My fists hurts from punching you
Your ignorance is killing me

(Chorus)

(Breakdown):
As you taunt me more and more
The veins in my arms swell and become sore
Why are you doing this to me?
I wish you'd just let me be

(Chorus) 2x

(Screaming/End)
-----------------
"King Of All Excuses" written by me

Somebody pray for me 'Cause I can't pray for myself I've somehow lost faith I have seem to have failed again Afraid I'm confused and hurting inside Thoughts run amok in my mind So many questions It'll ache in every bone But will i die with someone or alone? If I die alone in the end of old age, then my life will be officially wasted But tell me, what's wrong with you?

(Chorus):
My skin is so pale The pain will never fail There's no remedy to cure it with But I don't deserve this Life's a fucking bitch I just hate it, so fuck you and burn in hell I guess I'm not well

Look at you, the king of all excuses Making up lies and be addicted to what I know is not real Look at you, acting like a punk that thinks you're all that You got it so easy, don't you? No one even likes you Sure, I am hated, but I get by just fine without acting like you do Wiping your feet on everyone, even forcing your hand to add more friends How stupid are you anyway?

(Chorus) 2x

Blink your eyes It all comes crashing down This pain will ache for awhile So look at you, the king of all excuses Just turn away... NO! NO! NO! NO!

(Chorus) 2x
------------

That's it for now... what y'all think? oh by the way since i'm starting the band again since i moved to austin, write to me at 1102 South Congress Avenue Austin, Tx 78704 The name is Christopher Colton Dugger but my name will be changed next year when I'm 18. Or wait til i get a fan base started up again. I have a site but it's gone shitty so i'm gonna make up a new one when the band is together again. See ya.

that is some wild stuff man....it is just pouring out of your soul...keep up the good work....

staind saved my life so it's helping me to release my pains, torments, hatred, etc. instead of keeping it bottled it all up inside. U know where I could send a letter to staind? I wanna thank them.

here's some lyrics. enjoy!

"Lost Soul" written by me and mario k.

I'm crawling in my pains
they're drawing me, not forgiving me
there's no end
I'm losing myself in the vast abyss
I'm falling/ can't go back, yet I'm still trying
there's no turning back now

(Pre-Chorus):
Watching my steps
everywhere is cold
[I'm lost forever/My soul is lost to me]
Avoiding my defects
everything is gone
[I'm lost forever/My soul is lost to me]
I have to survive alone

(Chorus):
I have nowhere to go
I'm pushed away
Stuck in this place
with the voices in my head
I have nowhere to go
can't survive one day
without being ignored
my lost soul

I'm walking in my tears
they're suffocating me and stopping me
my wounds will never be healed
I've lost mysef in the empty darkness
There's no future, no past/Anything without a beginning can't last
my soul is sealed

(Pre-Chorus)

(Chorus)

Everything is falling apart before my eyes
don't know who to trust because of those lies
I'm dying and it's killing me inside
I'm in the wrong place at the wrong time
I continue to get hurt by the painful lies

(Chorus) 2x

(Ending Chorus):
Everything's falling apart before my eyes
I am lost within
I continue to get hurt because of those lies
This is how it ends
My wounds are now the scars of life
I will never heal...

Fuck it...
----------
"Kasey" written by me

I saw your picture in the papers and it made me sick It reminds me of back then when you feed off the attention Reminding me of the pain you caused me Ripping me from the inside, forcing me to remember those years

(Chorus):
Kasey, can you see that you're not perfect? COME AND FEEL MY ANGER as we fight again RIP OFF YOUR FACE since you took away all I've gained FEAR ME AND RUN AWAY as I rip into you again FEED MY PAIN AND FEEL MY HATRED PERFECTION DOESN'T EXIST and you'll never change

You tossed me and never knew me It's like being thrown away into the trash Allow me to lock you up in a cage Get to know all your fears But please, take your time, 'cause I don't wanna see your tainted smile killing me

(Chorus)

(Bridge):
I'll always feel the same as long you're acting this way You still think they all worship you And you thought I was someone you could step on Why won't you take it all away again and force me into the fetal position?!?!

(Chorus)

(B-Section):
I'm gonna take away everything you love Gonna prove to you that I'm not good for nothing (4x)
RIF OFF YOUR SO-CALLED PERFECT FACE!

(Chorus) 2x

(Screaming into outro)
-----------
"Lost in your apathy" by me

(Chorus):
Lost in your apathy Your taunts is toxicity Just leave me the fuck alone Allow me to walk into rain that's so cold I hate your fucking apathy

All I am, you rip away 'Til there's nothing left for me to put together I walked away, nothing left to say How could you run me away? Why didn't you left me stay? All I wanted was peace and somewhere to belong Then you came in and fucked it up Now I'm back, here to stay I WON'T BUDGE AT ALL!

(Chorus)

All I try to do, you stop it before it's created Then I crumble, buried with your mudshovel I turned Why should I fray? With the enemy that I hate I'll never succumb to you I will fuck you up if you fuck with me again Hear me scream into your ears Let's just see if I'm your fear I WON'T BEND FOR YOU!

(Chorus)

(Screams)

Turn away, turn away/Just turn away! (10x)

Just turn away You make me insane I am afraid of you I hate you Run away Run away Run away RUN AWAY FROM YOU!

(Chorus) 2x

APATHY! APATHY
FUCK YOUR APATHY! (6x)
------------

that's all for now... see ya later today.

Here's a new song just recently written in like 1 hour!

"Perplexity" by me

All alone in my room
An lost soul feelin' gloom
So misunderstood at times like this
I scream out my lungs
My heart rate beats so fast with this song
Release frustration and stress so strong
Push me 'til I break, won't you?
Screw your fake sympathy

(Chorus):
PERPLEXITY IN MY MIND!
PERPLEXITIES WITH MY MENTALITY!
Dazed and confused, I don't know what to do
Hate me all you want, I still got Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder/PERPLEXITY!
Perplexity in my nervous system

So blind in my addictions
I'm trying to kick it
Strange that I feel this way
It's so distracting with the voices in my head
They don't tell me to commit suicide
Instead, they tell me to release it all on paper when I write
Keep bugging me 'til I bend just to please you
Fuck your addiction to attention

(Chorus)

I HATE YOUR SMILE! It blinds me
I HATE YOUR OBSESSION WITH ME! It kills me
Nevertheless, you still do it and you love every minute of it
Just go...

(Chorus)

Can't you see that you damaged me?
You're still killing me, so stop it
PERPLEXITY WITHIN ME!
IT'S LIKE I'M FUCKING PARANOID
LOOKING OVER MY BACK!

(Chorus) 2x

Perplexity (4x)
-----------

hope u enjoyed it.

"Dedication"

To those who waited in the rain and come up to me and say, "Thank you." Well, this is for you

To everyone I know and love, thanks for watching out for me

Thanks for taking the time to hear what I had to say And thanks for caring when so many hates me

I'm not fine just yet I have a long way to go before I'm truly home But thanks anyway

Write me sometime At least it'd help me cope with what I go through

I dedicate this song for you (4x)

Help me through this so I can be fine again I don't want to feel the pain Sick of caving in Somebody, please help me out here Thank you...
-----------
"Forever" dedicated to my girlfriend, Janna. I love you.

(Chorus):
Forever, forever
we'll be together
Forever, forever
we'll love each other
I'll love you forever
I'll be around forever

I sleep away the hours
then I think of you
you make me feel alive
you helped me through my darkest times
and I thank you with a kiss
I don't want to be with nobody else but you

(Chorus)

The you glide across towards me
I'm waiting to embrace you
I feel the clarity seeping in
it flows like a calm river - I'm lost in the fields of innocence
am I strong enough now that you're in my life?
Take me inside for you are my salvation

(Chorus)

(Breakdown):
take me away from this terrifying hell
be with me in the fields of innocence
it's where we belong - right at home
no negativity anymore
your smile starts my day
the darkness starts to fade
your voice screamed away my fears
we're connected somehow
I guess we'll be all right together...

(Chorus)

(instrumental break)

(Chorus) 2x

I'll be with you forever 'til the end...
-------------

That's it for now. I'm bored fucked out of my mind.... or whatever the phrase is. I'll post some more later.

here's some lyrics:

"Days Of Depression"

I feel like a whore, raped down
All I do, I can't do anymore
I need to get this out of my system
All I hate, all I love, all I know, all I feel
Just let it all out before it consumes me
These are the days when I felt low

(Chorus):
Days of depression
I hate it, it kills me
Days of depression
Tortured and tormented forever (2x)

Dress myself up and walk around
I feel sad, people look at me
Not many friends in my life so I hate it here
But I suffer through it all, so I think it's enough
Why does everyone truly hate me so badly?
I did nothing, yet these are the days I remember

(Chorus) 2x

Look at me, JUST look at me
Do you like WHAT you see?
Does it truly SICKEN you?
Get away, get away, get away
Get away, get away, get away

(Chorus) 2x

I suffocate...
Fuck me and get it over with
Just rid me of my happiness
You're like a sickness coming down hard on me
I hate the enemy
I want to flow with the energy
I hate everyone except those who stands by me
I love everything that keeps me happy
I am human, and I deserve to be loved
There's too much pain, hate and anger inside me
Rid me of it
I don't wanna ever cut myself again

(Chorus) 6x
-------------
"Lost"

Shall I risk everything?
Bleed away into nothing
Christ, can you hear me?
Are You fucking deaf? LISTEN!
I want You to save me
Don't make me give up my faith again
Not after all I've done

(Chorus):
I bleed like tourniquet
I'm about to give up
I quit this life
Unless You save me, there's nothing I can do
Except to just walk around 'til I die of old age
And suffer forever, lost somewhere in the middle

I want to live in happiness
Lord, won't You hang onto me?
I'm dying inside and I'm crying
Why hasn't my prayers been answered?
I need You right now
Don't walk away from me again
Not after all I've been through

(Chorus)

Bleed (4x)

I shall not run and hide
I will face this and accept You
Come into me, breathe life into me
And let me live again
Let me see You, my Lord
I hate feeling so alone...

(Chorus) 2x

I want to breathe...
------------

"Days Of Depression" talks about the depression I feel inside and is a bit mixed up in a staind/seether style.

"Lost" talks about trying to find Jesus and His father, God and hopefully never be astray again. I'm trying to hang on right now.

HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE LYRICS!

These are some outstanding lyrics. You are very talented. "Days Of Depression" is my favorite...I can relate with every line. Keep up the good work.

thanks. I'll be posting new lyrics and a song from my side project, Deadbeat Society. It's called "Fraility" (from my side project.) it's very good shit.

here it is!

here's a new song from Deadbeat Society.

"Fraility"

Bloody tears is shed
There she stands next to the tombstone
And she shed those tears for someone unknown to me
An thousand angels cries again
It's the anniversary when she lost someone close to her

(Chorus):
And so she cries as butterflies and doves fly away
Winter has come and she is cold
Her face is so haunted to me
'Cause I've seen her before somewhere else
She is broken down with fraility

Wind blows the leaves away
She walks in the city of angels
Life flashes by so quickly as she sees nothing
Nothing but blur to her sight
She is empty and she is nothing to everyone

(Chorus)

(Vocalizing)

So she looks into the mirror and her soul bleeds
inside
And she breaks it into a shattered image
and her fist bleeds
She cannot suffer no more, so she cries again
It's sad
She left a note and fell away with blood coursing out
of her wrists
She took this last breath and said:
"FUCK YOU, CRUEL WORLD!"
If only life has a rewind button just for this moment
She could change it all and lived.

(Vocalizing then screams)

(Chorus)

So she lay there, withering away.

(End)
-------

ENJOY!

hey i'm back. will post some more later.

quote:

Originally posted by staindteen:
here it is!

here's a new song from Deadbeat Society.

"Fraility"

Bloody tears is shed
There she stands next to the tombstone
And she shed those tears for someone unknown to me
An thousand angels cries again
It's the anniversary when she lost someone close to her

(Chorus):
And so she cries as butterflies and doves fly away
Winter has come and she is cold
Her face is so haunted to me
'Cause I've seen her before somewhere else
She is broken down with fraility

Wind blows the leaves away
She walks in the city of angels
Life flashes by so quickly as she sees nothing
Nothing but blur to her sight
She is empty and she is nothing to everyone

(Chorus)

(Vocalizing)

So she looks into the mirror and her soul bleeds
inside
And she breaks it into a shattered image
and her fist bleeds
She cannot suffer no more, so she cries again
It's sad
She left a note and fell away with blood coursing out
of her wrists
She took this last breath and said:
"FUCK YOU, CRUEL WORLD!"
If only life has a rewind button just for this moment
She could change it all and lived.

(Vocalizing then screams)

(Chorus)

So she lay there, withering away.

(End)
-------

ENJOY!

BOO!

Here's our first single lyrics of "6 Years' Silence" from my band Hybrid Dysfunction. We'll be releasing it soon.

"6 Years' Silence"

As I slowly change into the person I am today
I begin to rediscover my memory of the 6 years I lived
These years were my life as an teenager so tormented
I lost so much along the way and I really feel so alone
I guess you could say that I'm completely fucked up
From suicidal thoughts to walking away

Chorus-
I've been silenced for far too long
I wanted to be heard, not ignored
Now my silence is broken and I'm ready to speak up
This is my 6 years' silence finally being told

As I remember lovers and friendships come and go
I begin to cry for those not here today with me
I used to be happy once and it was when I was witth her
She changed my entire perspective on my life
She was a friend that I'll always remember
Now I'm here because of her kind words and our conversations

Chorus

As I'm reminded of my enemies, of my nightmares
I begin to realize of how I got fucked up in the first place
I've suffered for so long, so now I am awake
Suffering in silence now broken and so trapped in anger
I just want to move on tonight
So my silence I'm ready to break

Chorus 2x

Yeah 4x

(ends)